My Inspiration

The New York City Marathon is a little over a week away. No, I’m not running the marathon! I just ran a complete 5K for the first time about a month ago! Sheesh!

However, I know several people who are running it this year, and for a few of them, this will be their first marathon. While I won’t be running it, I think I am just as excited for them to run it as they are. You see, for most of them, they started just like I did. I’ve heard their stories of how they walked for 10 minutes, then 20, then 30. Then they started jogging for a minute or two while they were walking and it snowballed from there.

My friend Sheryl is an energizer bunny who runs, runs stairs for fun, and bikes everywhere in four-inch heels. She also has been training for the marathon will run her first ever marathon on November 4. She writes a fantastic blog about her fitness adventures at http://www.sherylyvette.com/ and recently blogged about her marathon training. Yes, she chronicles her fitness adventures for all to see, and it has been so fabulous to be a spectator of all of her new fitness milestones.

One of my other first-time marathon friends is Christina. She lost so much weight, which you can read about at http://www.weightwatchers.com/success/art/index.aspx?SuccessStoryId=16491&sc=17. She has been dealing with injuries for much of her training, which has made her rethink her strategy for the marathon. I know she is disappointed she won’t be running as fast as she might, I know she will still power through and have a fantastic race.

I know, this is supposed to be about me, and believe me it is. Sheryl and Christina and my other friends like them inspire me so much. I know they have put in tons of hours and produced lots of sweat and tears to get to run the marathon.  I see how they have struggled with injuries and illnesses to fight and overcome. Like me, they were also overweight not long ago, they worked and believed in themselves enough to get to this point.

This year I made a goal for myself to run nine New York Road Runners Races. I have run five races to date and have four more to go (I’m already registered for three of the four). My reasoning for doing this, besides the obvious health benefits: NYRR members (that’s me!!) who run nine races and perform one volunteer stint (which I’m doing this Sunday, probably in the rain) are automatically to the 2013 NYC Marathon. No, I’m not planning on running the marathon next year, despite what some people may think (and you know who you are), but I hate being told I can’t do something just because I didn’t run enough races or volunteer.

The point is, no matter when I run my first marathon, and I will, I know I will have to put in as much work as my friends have. In the past, I would dread all of the work that I need to put in and would probably avoid it. I don’t any longer. Yes, new challenges and obstacles can be scary. Dammit, they are scary, but I truly look forward to the challenges. I learned a long time ago that the harder you work for the things you want, the more precious they are when you get them. I plan on working my ass off.

It's Not Comfortable? Good!

I often strive to do something outside of my comfort zone: try a new running route; try running at a different time of the day; try a new fruit; etc. Sometimes I have fantastic results, like when I tried eating quinoa for the first time, and sometimes not so much (I found fresh lychees nothing special and am content if I never have them again). Now matter how they turn out, I’m always glad I do it.

Yesterday I brought some running gear into work determined to run during lunch. I wanted to get some running in yesterday, but I didn’t wake up early enough to do it in the morning and I had my weekly Dubs Dubs meeting that night. A lunchtime run seemed like the best choice. Yes, I run frequently but never in the middle of the day and never during my lunch hour at work.

At 12:50, I went into the bathroom, lugging my running clothes, and prepped for my run. Once I left the bathroom, took one last swig of water, grabbed my cell phone and a dollar (just in case I need water or something) and headed out the door. I work in Midtown East in Manhattan, not to far from Grand Central Station, so I headed east toward the river. There is a bike path/walkway right on the water, so I started running.

About 10 minutes into my run, I got the sharpest pain in the back of my calf into my foot. OWWW!! Every time I took a step, it felt like my entire lower leg and foot was on fire. I had to slow down to a limping walk to try and walk out the cramp(??) in my leg. I stopped to stretch it some, hoping I could get the kink out. And then I continued walking.

I alternated walking and stretching for several minutes until I got to an area where I could cross over the highway, which was about 24^th Street. I was still in a lot of pain, so I figured my run was done for the day, but I still had to walk back to my office. I was annoyed because I was so looking forward to the run. I really was enjoying, for the few short minutes I was able to, running along the water with the wind on my face. I cursed silently at my leg through much of the walk back.

As I was walking, I noticed the pain was slowly subsiding. A few blocks from the office, I noticed I wasn’t in pain at all. I decided to test the leg again, knowing that if it acted up again, I only had a short walk back to the office. I started and waited for the shooting pain to start, and it never came. I ran for about 5 minutes, but it was coming to the end of my lunch hour and I had to return to the office and still needed to cool down and stretch.

Dammit!! If I would have had more time, I definitely would have stayed out there longer. Stupid leg!

So, do I regret going outside my comfort zone and getting out there yesterday? No, because I wouldn’t have found the new route that is absolutely fantastic. Do I wish my body would do what I want it to? Of course, but it sometimes just doesn’t. I am able to realize, through experience, that every run is not going to be like that last one and it won’t keep me from doing it again. I definitely will go for another lunchtime run and soon. And I will keep stepping outside my comfort zone. If I don’t, then I will never experience anything new and where’s the fun in that??

NSV Is Not An Illness

As I mentioned in my previous post, I signed up for Mel’s eight-week tracker challenge. For this challenge, I need to track all of the food I eat and the exercise I do for the eight weeks.

Well, one week down. How did I do? Well, I wrote down everything I ate. It wasn’t pretty. There was greasy, fatty Chinese food and lots of homemade chocolate cookies (it’s my own fault that I made on Sunday when it was too miserable to leave the house). I didn’t fulfill my good health guidelines for a few days either. And I didn’t calculate points plus values on a few of the days. As I said, not pretty. No, I don’t remember all of this; I don’t have a photographic memory. I wrote it all down.

It is no surprise with the type of foods I ate that I gained a bit of weight. I wasn’t surprised at all when I saw the number on the scale. It was a little reminder that I can’t eat like that and expect to lose (not that I expected to). That’s the thing with keeping track of what you eat; you know when you’ve had a good week and when you’ve had a not so good week.

I was far from perfect this week and I’m not striving for perfection. Perfection is impossible and leads to failure. Consistency is key, and the more I eat the right foods the more successful I will be. This week I just strive to be better than I was last week. This is basically what all of my goals are: to be better than I was before.

Goal-setting is so important for me during this journey. It helps keep me focused on a specific task. I believe this tracker challenge is really helping me to focus on wheat I need to do to be successful. I used to carry this book around me. Every Tuesday (my weigh in day used to be Tuesday, so I would start fresh Tuesday mornings), I would write on one sheet of paper my goals for the week on one side and my NSVs for the week on the other. I stopped doing it several months ago. Well, I started doing it again this past week. I find it so important to get those goals down in writing as well as what I have accomplished.

Yes, not taking a free donut from the work kitchen may not seem much to some, but it is a big step during that weight loss journey. It is so easy to focus on all of the things I do “wrong” that I don’t focus on all of the positive changes. By keeping track of the NSVs, I am acknowledging all of the hard work I am doing and all of the small ways I am changing. By focusing on the negative, I am more likely to think I can’t do it give up.

Besides, keeping track of all of those little NSVs is a great way to see how far I’ve traveled on this journey. Being at the half-way point, it can seem at times like I will never get there, but when I look at all of the little things I’ve accomplished and all of the ways I have already changed for the better, it doesn’t seem hopeless. When I look back at my books years from now, I want to remember how great it felt to run a 5k for the first time, the first time I tasted a persimmons (mmm, liquid sugar!) or when I put on a shirt this morning that didn’t fit six months ago but fits me now.

By the way, this is also why I started this blog; just another way to keep a record of all that I have done and will do. I’m sure one day, perhaps when I reach my goal weight, I will read this post and remember fondly Mel’s tracker challenge and it got me back to tracking again.

Your Challenge, If You Choose To Accept It

There are seven weeks before Thanksgiving. For many, this is the beginning of the Bermuda Triangle for weight loss: Thanksgiving, Christmas (or Channukah or Kwanzaa) and New Year’s. It’s like everything we’ve learned over the last nine months are forgotten about in a haze of baked goods, candy and roasted meats and fishes (not to mention all of the alcohol). All of the behavior changes we’ve made are thrown out the window for latkes, cookies, and champagne. Then we come back from the food and drink haze on January 2^nd hung over, weighing more that we did on November 20^th and looking to start all over again.

Starting last week, the “Dubs-Dubs” is working into its meetings the tools every member needs to set him or herself up for success during the Bermuda Triangle. This week was all about tracking.

As I mentioned before, this is the one aspect of weight loss that I seem to have the biggest problem sticking with. I guess it’s the weight loss mirror for me and it tells me what I’ve done. When I’ve done something really positive, like run for 45 minutes, I don’t have any problems tracking it. It’s when I haven’t done what I think I should is when I resist tracking the most. It’s as if it didn’t happen if I didn’t track it. Of course this isn’t true. My ass always will track what I’ve done even when I don’t, so who and I trying to hide it from? Me, I guess.

However, once I don’t write one thing down, it just becomes easier to “forget” to track something else. The next thing I know, it’s Tuesday night and I only tracked Wednesday and Thursday (my weigh in day is Wednesday night, so my weight loss week starts on Wednesday).

However, tracking is only bad because I give it that negative value. It is the mirror. It is the truth. It is information. It can tell me if I’ve fulfilled my good health guidelines. It can tell me what kinds of foods I’m eating and when and if they are satisfying my hunger. It can show me how much progress I’m making over time. It can tell me how many inches I’ve lost and how many sizes I’m down. It can even tell me if I’ve achieved my goals for that week. Yes, I can track much more than just food and exercise and I can learn so much about myself, but only if I actually do it.

During the second of two meetings I attend on Wednesday nights, a fellow member mentioned that another leader gave them a tracker challenge, where members had to track all food and activity for 12 weeks and then would get a star when they brought in their trackers each week and it was complete. So, the ever fabulous WW leader Melanie offered us the same challenge for 8 weeks. Of course I signed up for this challenge! This is exactly what I need right now. Is it weird that I am excited to complete this challenge and track everything for the next 56 days? Maybe, but if it works, I don’t care.

During a meeting a few weeks ago, Joey, a fellow member said this about tracking, “Your weight loss is your journey and your tracker is your map.” If I use that map, then I can know where I’ve been and how far I’ve traveled.

What Is A Goal If You Don't Act On It?

Goal-setting is a great way to motivate yourself into action. You see, first you set a goal that is hopefully easily attainable yet just hard enough to make you work a little harder than usual to achieve it. Then you create a plan of action, steps you are to perform to get to that goal. Then you just do it.

Sounds easy, right? Only if you actually do anything beyond setting the goal. I always have goals: get in my good health guidelines each day; stay withing my daily points target; stay within my weekly points allowance; run today; run tomorrow; run an entire 4 miler; etc. I have lots and lots of goals; some are small and will only take moments or hours to do, while others may take years.

It’s good to have goals, but to achieve those goals, you need to actually work at achieving them. I really haven’t been working at anything lately. I don’t quite know why, but I have not been tracking my food even though I know I need to do this. I have not been running, even though I have a race in 4 weeks.

Why? I don’t know exactly, but I know that based on history, I just seem to always get in my own way. Yes, weight loss and being healthy is something that I physically do, and if I took all of the thought out of it, I know I would be extremely successful. No, I would have already achieved my goals. So why do I always seem to get in my own way? Is it because I have been overweight since high school and am afraid of the unknown? Am I afraid I will be a different person and I won’t like that person? I don’t know.

Whatever, the reason, I was not happy the way I was. Sliding back into old behaviors may seem comfortable at first, but it's not. Not when I will no longer beable to fit into my clothes. So I need to stop it now. Moments ago, I looked myself in the bathroom mirror and told myself “Enough! This stops now! You can do better than this! You ARE better than this!”

I AM better than what I have been doing lately, so I am taking the opportunity, with the first day of the new month, to start again. I already tracked what I have and will be eating for the rest of the day. I laid out my running clothes at home for tonight when I get home. (And yes, I plan on running tonight. No, I am GOING to run tonight!) I am setting up a running schedule for the next two months. No more excuses.

No one ever achieved anything by hoping and wishing for it. I can’t just sit on the sidelines and expect results. I need to continue my active role in my own health and well-being. I need to act if I want to achieve my goals. And I need to start now.